The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be: A Speculative Memoir of Transracial Adoption

A remarkable portrait of growing up as a mixed-Black transracial adoptee, from the acclaimed author of Dream Country.
A MICHAEL L. PRINTZ HONOR BOOK AND KIRKUS REVIEWS BEST YOUNG ADULT BOOK OF THE CENTURY
“A fantastical, transcendent memory collage that shirks convention in search of what is real and true about familial bonds.”—Publishers Weekly, starred review
Part memoir, part speculative fiction, The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be tells the true story of author Shannon Gibney’s experience growing up as the adopted Black daughter of white parents in America alongside the fictional story of Erin Powers, the name Shannon was given at birth by the white woman who put her up for adoption.
At its core, the novel is a tale of two girls on two different timelines, occasionally bridged by a mysterious portal and their shared search for a complete picture of their origins. Gibney surrounds her stories with reproductions of her own adoption documents, letters, family photographs, interviews, medical records, and brief essays on the surreal absurdities of the adoptee experience.
Strikingly honest and beautifully written, this speculative memoir explores the rarely depicted experience of transracial adoption first-hand, and offers an insightful look into the discovery of one’s own identity.
A MICHAEL L. PRINTZ HONOR BOOK AND KIRKUS REVIEWS BEST YOUNG ADULT BOOK OF THE CENTURY
“A fantastical, transcendent memory collage that shirks convention in search of what is real and true about familial bonds.”—Publishers Weekly, starred review
Part memoir, part speculative fiction, The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be tells the true story of author Shannon Gibney’s experience growing up as the adopted Black daughter of white parents in America alongside the fictional story of Erin Powers, the name Shannon was given at birth by the white woman who put her up for adoption.
At its core, the novel is a tale of two girls on two different timelines, occasionally bridged by a mysterious portal and their shared search for a complete picture of their origins. Gibney surrounds her stories with reproductions of her own adoption documents, letters, family photographs, interviews, medical records, and brief essays on the surreal absurdities of the adoptee experience.
Strikingly honest and beautifully written, this speculative memoir explores the rarely depicted experience of transracial adoption first-hand, and offers an insightful look into the discovery of one’s own identity.
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Community Reviews
This creative speculative memoir provides a glimpse into an adoptees’ ghost kingdom, termed by the late adoptee activist and psychologist Betty Jean Lifton, PhD. The ghost kingdom is the place where the you that never was exists/existed. The secrecy in adoption leads many of us to fantasize about what would have, could have been. Shannon masterfully brings us down both paths - of her as Shannon and of her as the maybe-Erin who never was. I particularly loved the artifacts (documents) included in the book.
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