If I Stay

Gayle Forman has a beautiful way of writing that makes you forget the tragedy, focus on the splendid, then circle back around to the devastation.

This one is sad.
Jeeze.

This was such a beautiful story. And a fun read. It's hard to call a book about death a "fun" read, but the story of the main characters is mainly told in flashbacks. And the author uses a lot of musical references, which is always a plus for me. She actually goes through all the music at the end of the book (at least in my copy) and gives a little background on each.
There's also a piece in the back about how a tragic event involving close friends of hers actually led her to writing this story.
It says on the front of the book that it will appeal to Twilight fans. I have no idea why because I don't know anything about the Twilight stories. This IS mostly about a teenage girl and her "choice" whether to live or die, so maybe that's where they make the connection?
I picked it up because I heard about it on NPR, where someone was talking about how they TOTALLY judged this book by the cover but it paid off in the end.
I agree.
And now I'm gonna go download all those songs...

It's not about the boy.

Seriously. Where did this book come from? Or maybe the better question is what the hell have I been doing the past few years that this was out, and I was reading much less impressive books?

I am going to keep this review short and sweet...much like this book.

Mia gets in an accident very early on in the book. The remainder of the book is her watching the events post-accident unfold (mostly in the hospital) and memories of her life. This could have gone south for me very quickly. It sounded a bit too much like [b:The Lovely Bones|12232938|The Lovely Bones|Alice Sebold|https:d202m5krfqbpi5.cloudfront.net/books/1312524577s/12232938.jpg|1145090], which I detested. So what was so superb about this one that I gave it five stars and bumped it over to my favorites list?

1. The MC, Mia, is not an annoying, cliché Mary Sue. She has a best friend who is as wonderful as she is. I often find in these books that the best friend is either much cooler than the MC. But these two truly act like best friends. As equals. She has a boyfriend and doesn't act like a total wet blanket around him. She isn't full of teen angst and actually loves and respects her parents (which would be hard not to because they are exceptionally cool parents). She doesn't talk about how irritating her little brother is but instead how funny he is. I have a younger brother who is ten years younger than I am (the same age gap between Mia and her brother) and felt a familiar tug when she described their relationship.

2. The other characters. The best friend, boyfriend, parents, grandparents, little brother. They felt very real to me.

The best friend, Kim, is everything you would want in a best friend. She is honest, comical, supportive. The boyfriend, Adam, is everything you would want in a boyfriend. Loving, romantic, accepting. What makes this work is that they are not without their flaws and still have normal arguments with the Mia that you would really have with your best friend or boyfriend. It didn't feel fake or forced.

Mia's family is amazing. They are the family I think I will have with my children minus the punk hair and leather (I have a strong fear of leather pants after the episode where Ross wore them on Friends). Even her grandparents are amazing.

I am pretty sure I feel in love with Mia's mother after this line (stated while in labor):
Don't be scared, she'd whisper. Women can handle the worst kind of pain. You'll find out one day. Then she'd scream fuck again.

3. The story is never boring. I read this in one day. I couldn't put it down even though it was only available on the computer, and I had to lug my laptop around with me everywhere - the laundry room, the bathroom, the kitchen...you get the idea. There was a lot of talk about music. There was a lot about Mia and her cello and her love of classical music. Let me tell you right now:

I FUCKING HATE WHEN A MAIN CHARACTER IN A YOUNG ADULT BOOK RECOGNIZES RANDOM CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING IN AN ELEVATOR/WAITING ROOM/'93 BUICK CENTURY EVEN THOUGH THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO INDICATE HOW OR WHY THEY WOULD KNOW THIS.

However, Mia's love for classical music actually made sense. It was supported by an actual background that would make her appreciate this type of music. Gayle Forman, I cannot thank you enough for doing this.

4. This book made me cry. Several times. At one point, I was doing the ugly sob with my hand clamped over my mouth. Here's the deal. A couple months ago, I went on some fun meds because of some super fun things called depression and anxiety (winter bums me out, yo. This medication can make me feel like a robot, which is usually better than feeling like I am on the verge of having an anxiety attack every two seconds. I am the big baby cry face in our family who hasn't teared up since going on this medication. This book completely messed me up and broke through my medicinal no-feelings wall. And I was actually relieved to feel again. And then I got a little freaked out thinking what a wreck I would have been had I read this a few months ago!

This book is beautiful. It is very well written, flowing so well with no awkward sentences. It immersed me in fictional Mia's life and made me stop and think about my own (very real) life. I cannot wait to read the next book.

Bravo!