How Should a Person Be?: A Novel from Life

Chosen as one of fifteen remarkable books by women that are shaping the way we read and write in the 21st century by the book critics of The New York Times

"Funny...odd, original, and nearly unclassifiable...unlike any novel I can think of."—David Haglund, The New York Times Book Review


"Brutally honest and stylistically inventive, cerebral, and sexy."—San Francisco Chronicle

Named a Book of the Year by The New York Times Book Review, The New Yorker, San Francisco Chronicle, Salon, Flavorpill, The New Republic, The New York Observer, The Huffington Post

A raw, startling, genre-defying novel of friendship, sex, and love in the new millennium—a compulsive read that's like "spending a day with your new best friend" (Bookforum)

By turns loved and reviled upon its U.S. publication, Sheila Heti's "breakthrough novel" (Chris Kraus, Los Angeles Review of Books) is an unabashedly honest and hilarious tour through the unknowable pieces of one woman's heart and mind. Part literary novel, part self-help manual, and part vivid exploration of the artistic and sexual impulse, How Should a Person Be? earned Heti comparisons to Henry Miller, Joan Didion, Mary McCarthy, and Flaubert, while shocking and exciting readers with its raw, urgent depiction of female friendship and of the shape of our lives now. Irreverent, brilliant, and completely original, Heti challenges, questions, frustrates, and entertains in equal measure. With urgency and candor she asks: What is the most noble way to love? What kind of person should you be?

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Published Jun 25, 2013

320 pages

Average rating: 5.33

3 RATINGS

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Community Reviews

Khris Sellin
Jul 05, 2024
4/10 stars
I guess I'm not the target audience for this book, but it was just painful. Ms. Heti and her friends sit around mostly congratulating themselves on how smart, artistic, and evolved they are, but really are just self-involved, self-absorbed 30-somethings (yes, 30-somethings, sounding more like 20-somethings!). She is supposedly studying people to learn "how should a person be," but there are few life lessons learned here, other than the revelation she has, as another reader pointed out, while sticking her nose in some guy's hairy ass.

There were some interesting moments. I enjoyed the dialogue in the chapter Sheila Wanders in the Copy Shop. And I have to admit, unlike most readers, and apart from said hairy ass from above, I enjoyed the sex scenes.
E Clou
May 10, 2023
4/10 stars
Pretentious gibberish. The narrator has terrible judgment and is presented as a genius.

I did enjoy the last line though.

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