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How You Bear It
Jiu-jitsu champion, professional fighter, and world-class coach Tom DeBlass became a hero in the martial arts community for his blue-collar roots and no-excuses approach to life. Today, he heads dozens of academies and has coached elite athletes such as world champion Garry Tonon. He’s also the creator of some of the most popular jiu-jitsu instructionals in the world.
Follow the story of a runt from New Jersey, told by Tom to his father during the last year of his life. Bullied from a young age, Tom holds nothing back about being raised in a turbulent household where chaos was normal and strong ties to family were constantly tested. As he discovers the self-healing powers of sports and martial arts, Tom becomes a champion fighter as a young man. But his life brings on a new family, more students, and being responsible for more than just himself. Tom is forced to confront the driven competitor within, the one who will always pursue another medal, another victory. In his quest to finally heal from his past and find happiness, Tom learns an important lesson: it’s not what you bear, but how you bear it.
This discussion guide was shared and sponsored in partnership with Dartfrog Books.
Book club questions for How You Bear It by Louis Martin and Tom DeBlass
Use these discussion questions to guide your next book club meeting.
While you may not be involved with Jiu-Jitsu, were there any general principles from the story that you were able to take away for living with resilience in your own life? Explain.
DeBlass talks a lot about addiction in the book. Has addiction touched your life in some way? If so, how has it affected your outlook?
How do you define happiness in your life, and have you found it? If so, what techniques have helped you realize and hold onto that happiness?
Martial arts teach a lot more than just the techniques of the sport. The discipline required in martial arts translates to many other areas of life. What are the most important disciplines for you, in your own life?
In the book, DeBlass says that what matters is not what you bear, but how you bear it. Do you agree with that? What examples can you share from your own life about bearing what life brings you in a way that leads to triumph?
How You Bear It Book Club Questions PDF
Click here for a printable PDF of the How You Bear It discussion questions