When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times (Shambhala Classics)

Thinking back, I cannot believe that I'd give up on this book so quickly when I tried reading it for the first time. I think I didn't even get past chapter one, which was such a shame. I can't remember what urged me to give this book a shot again, but I'm glad I did. Reading this was like having a long, long session of self-reflection and learning. What is this learning? I have already read quite a number of books on Buddhism, but this one by Pema Chödrön brought my understanding further. Buddhism is more than a religion. It is about understanding oneself through the philosophy that Buddha himself had taught. It is through understanding oneself that compassion for oneself can happen — and with that feeling of maitri, we can then extend loving-kindness to the rest of the world effortlessly. This sense of compassion can be for the inevitable impermanence that happens in all of our lives. This compassion can be for all the 'bad' feelings we experience everyday. Reading this book brought so much positive emotions in me that there was a point in time when I just felt so at peace with everything. It came and went, of course, but that made me realise that what Pema wrote was true and very useful. It is not easy, yes, but it is about practise, and after reading this, it has motivated me to try harder and more relentlessly. One really doesn't have to be a Buddhist to appreciate it all.

I didn't agree with everything though. Chapter 20 on the trick of choicelessness boggled my mind. So did chapter 21. Both chapters seemed to tell readers that sometimes, letting everything fall apart is how we can truly live. To a certain extent, that may be true, but the example Pema Chödrön chose to use to illustrate her point was terrible and very unrelatable, because money was the subject. If problems arise, wouldn't it be wiser to calm down and think of a solution rather than calm down and not do something that is habitual AKA sitting around and do nothing? I used to panic at every trouble that arises, but I have since learnt to stop that habit and make myself calm down when the situation calls for it and think of a solution fast with a clearer mind. Have I been doing it wrong? I don't think so. I might have misunderstood what Pema Chödrön was trying to put across though... that could be it. But if so, I felt the example used could be better.

This book is short, but it's packed with a lot of subjects that make you think. Pema Chödrön is very good with her sense of humour, which makes the entire reading journey fun. If there's one thing I'll remember about this book forever is the fact that it had taught me how to make use of my meditation sessions more effectively. Sometime in the future, I'd read this book again. It is personal, relatable and realistic. It is not only for Buddhists, or for those facing difficult times at this point in their lives; it is for everybody.