The In-Between: Unforgettable Encounters During Life's Final Moments
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Passionate advocate for end-of-life care and TikTok star Hadley Vlahos shares moving stories of joy, wisdom, and redemption from her patients’ final moments in this “brilliant” (Zibby Owens, Good Morning America) memoir.
“This extraordinary book helps dispel fear around death and dying—revealing it to be a natural part of our soul’s evolution.”—Laura Lynne Jackson, New York Times bestselling author of Signs and The Light Between Us
Talking about death and dying is considered taboo in polite company, and even in the medical field. Our ideas about dying are confusing at best: Will our memories flash before our eyes? Regrets consume our thoughts? Does a bright light appear at the end of a tunnel? For most people, it will be a slower process, one eased with preparedness, good humor, and a bit of faith. At the forefront of changing attitudes around palliative care is hospice nurse Hadley Vlahos, who shows that end-of-life care can teach us just as much about how to live as it does about how we die.
Vlahos was raised in a strict religious household, but began questioning her beliefs in high school after the sudden death of a friend. When she got pregnant at nineteen, she was shunned by her community and enrolled herself in nursing school to be able to support herself and her baby. But nursing soon became more than a job: when she focused on palliative care and hospice work, it became a calling.
In The In-Between, Vlahos recounts the most impactful experiences she’s had with the people she’s worked with—from the woman who never once questioned her faith until she was close to death, to the older man seeing visions of his late daughter, to the young patient who laments that she spent too much of her short life worrying about what others thought of her—while also sharing her own fascinating journey.
Written with profound insight, humility, and respect, The In-Between is a heartrending memoir that shows how caring for others can transform a life while also offering wisdom and comfort for those dealing with loss and providing inspiration for how to live now.
“This extraordinary book helps dispel fear around death and dying—revealing it to be a natural part of our soul’s evolution.”—Laura Lynne Jackson, New York Times bestselling author of Signs and The Light Between Us
Talking about death and dying is considered taboo in polite company, and even in the medical field. Our ideas about dying are confusing at best: Will our memories flash before our eyes? Regrets consume our thoughts? Does a bright light appear at the end of a tunnel? For most people, it will be a slower process, one eased with preparedness, good humor, and a bit of faith. At the forefront of changing attitudes around palliative care is hospice nurse Hadley Vlahos, who shows that end-of-life care can teach us just as much about how to live as it does about how we die.
Vlahos was raised in a strict religious household, but began questioning her beliefs in high school after the sudden death of a friend. When she got pregnant at nineteen, she was shunned by her community and enrolled herself in nursing school to be able to support herself and her baby. But nursing soon became more than a job: when she focused on palliative care and hospice work, it became a calling.
In The In-Between, Vlahos recounts the most impactful experiences she’s had with the people she’s worked with—from the woman who never once questioned her faith until she was close to death, to the older man seeing visions of his late daughter, to the young patient who laments that she spent too much of her short life worrying about what others thought of her—while also sharing her own fascinating journey.
Written with profound insight, humility, and respect, The In-Between is a heartrending memoir that shows how caring for others can transform a life while also offering wisdom and comfort for those dealing with loss and providing inspiration for how to live now.
BUY THE BOOK
Community Reviews
thenextgoodbook.com
What’s it about?
This is a memoir written by hospice nurse Hadley Vlahos. Her story begins as she decides to become a nurse and then focuses on her experiences in hospice care. She tells the stories of twelve different hospice patients and how those patients impacted her life and work.
What did it make me think about?
End of life and the in-between.
Should I read it?
I read this as part of the hospice program I volunteer with in Vero Beach, Florida. Thank you VNA Hospice- you are truly a gift to so many. For their volunteers, they have organized a monthly book club, and this is our first book. What a great selection!
Hadley Vlahos is just who you would want to show up at your door if you are being assessed to enter the hospice program. She certainly conveys in this book the honor and responsibility that come with being involved in the final stages of someone’s life (unlike the nurses, the volunteers benefit from having no medical responsibilities). Along with the medical staff, the caregivers are truly the heroes, as they carry a heavy load. I enjoyed these stories, and anyone interested in end-of-life issues will also appreciate them.
Quote-
“While I still don’t have all the answers, the one thing I can tell you for certain is that there are things that defy medical explanations, and that in between here and whatever comes next, there is something powerful and peaceful.”
What’s it about?
This is a memoir written by hospice nurse Hadley Vlahos. Her story begins as she decides to become a nurse and then focuses on her experiences in hospice care. She tells the stories of twelve different hospice patients and how those patients impacted her life and work.
What did it make me think about?
End of life and the in-between.
Should I read it?
I read this as part of the hospice program I volunteer with in Vero Beach, Florida. Thank you VNA Hospice- you are truly a gift to so many. For their volunteers, they have organized a monthly book club, and this is our first book. What a great selection!
Hadley Vlahos is just who you would want to show up at your door if you are being assessed to enter the hospice program. She certainly conveys in this book the honor and responsibility that come with being involved in the final stages of someone’s life (unlike the nurses, the volunteers benefit from having no medical responsibilities). Along with the medical staff, the caregivers are truly the heroes, as they carry a heavy load. I enjoyed these stories, and anyone interested in end-of-life issues will also appreciate them.
Quote-
“While I still don’t have all the answers, the one thing I can tell you for certain is that there are things that defy medical explanations, and that in between here and whatever comes next, there is something powerful and peaceful.”
Well this was an emotional read, I thought I was prepared for it. I worked in assisted living for 16 years and often spent the last of my residents days in hospice holding their hands and singing for them so I thought I was ready for this. I was not. This was one of my monthly recommendations for 12 months and I probably would have stayed clean of it otherwise because it is a heartbreaking subject. I think this is one that everyone should read. If you haven't experienced the death of a loved one or hospice, consider yourself lucky. Some of the moments in this one brought me back to those days so by chapter two I was already bawling. As this story goes on it's just not the moments of hospice patients but you can see the author as she grows and matures personally and professionally from her experiences.
I've seen some of the reviews and although some of the things discussed are common knowledge if you have been in these situations, not all the time. I see people say that it's stereotypical and I see a lot of people complain about her mentioning the religious aspects in this story. As an autobiography you are reading about some bodies story so I'm not sure why that is an issue.
I've seen some of the reviews and although some of the things discussed are common knowledge if you have been in these situations, not all the time. I see people say that it's stereotypical and I see a lot of people complain about her mentioning the religious aspects in this story. As an autobiography you are reading about some bodies story so I'm not sure why that is an issue.
Hadley Vlahos “The In-Between” feels like is a freshman effort trying to tackle a senior-level dissertation. Vlahos attempts to make an argument for a third way between believing and non-believing by sharing remembrances of the final days of her hospice patients along with the tumultuous and miraculous times of her own life. It’s a journey I was eager to read but should have checked my own expectations at the door.
Vlahos should first be commended for tackling such an emotional topic as hospice and end-of-life care. She does so with a decorum and straightforward prose that makes the topic accessible and less frightening than you might expect. The writing is at the same time so rudimentary that you’d wish it had just been delivered as a TED Talk or Podcast Series. The power in the message is dulled by Vlahos’ style but worth noting that topic deserves exploring all the same.
The accolades for the book rests solely in how Vlahos manages to gracefully argue for the “In-Between” as a space between the realities of life and death in contrast to how belief. Both shape how we seek care and what we think comes after we’re gone. In that space, there is room for all walks of life to find acceptance, peace, and purpose even in the final moments. It’s also a moment where the otherwise spiritual phenomena walk side by side with physiological events.
This exploration of a very metaphysical topic makes the book equal parts spiritual journey, self-help, and philosophical musing on what comes next. Especially in how Vlahos uses her own personal journey to highlight the lack of humanity in our healthcare system while also offering glimpses of deep compassion. It’s a quick and straightforward read that has promise but under delivers. Perhaps I was expecting something akin to Oliver Sacks and his book “An Anthropologist on Mars.”
See why thousands of readers are using Bookclubs to stay connected.