She's Not There: A Life in Two Genders

NATIONAL BESTSELLER • The seminal work of trans literature: a story of love, sex, selfhood, and understanding from the renowned author of Cleavage and co-author of Mad Honey

“A very funny memoir of growing up confused and a very smart consideration of what it means to be a woman.”—Anna Quindlen

When she changed genders, she changed the world. It was the groundbreaking publication of She’s Not There in 2003 that jump-started the transgender revolution. By turns hilarious and deeply moving, Jennifer Finney Boylanexplores the territory that lies between men and women, examines changing friendships, and rejoices in the redeeming power of love and family. Boylan’s humorous, wise voice helped make She’s Not There the first bestselling work by a transgender American—and transformed Boylan into a national spokeswoman for LGBTQ people, their families, and the people that love them. This updated and revised edition includes an epilogue from Jenny’s wife Grace; it also contains the original afterward by her friend, novelist and Pulitzer Prize winner Richard Russo.

“Love will prevail,” said Boylan’s conservative mother, as she learned about her daughter’s identity. She’s Not There is the story that helped bring about a world in which that change seems almost possible.
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Published Apr 30, 2013

352 pages

Average rating: 7.63

19 RATINGS

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Community Reviews

Anonymous
May 19, 2024
10/10 stars
I really enjoyed this book. It took a serious topic and dealt with it with humor. I loved the honesty of the book, and how times have changed in the time the original book was written.
Anonymous
Jun 09, 2023
10/10 stars
This was my first take at trying to read more queer books this year. And what a choice.
I had a bit of trouble with the narration at the beginning. There were scenes that didn't quite make sense to me (Nora, Gammie and her "friend", for example). But I found my way and I enjoyed it so much.

I loved the exploration of gender that Jenny did, and her honesty when dealing with it. I found her journey inspiring and, I am going to say it, lucky. She was always surrounded by people that loved her, people that stuck around, people that got over their own prejudices and just loved her. She also had the support of her family (only her mother at that point, but still) and her work environment. And ultimately, she had the funds to support her transition seamlessly and with no major bumps in the road. And I wish that were the case for all transgender people everywhere. I loved reading about this particular experience, but I know this doesn't represent the experience of all transgender people, every person is different and has a unique journey. This book only made me want to read more and more queer accounts of gender, family, transitions, and existing in the world.

I will say something about the afterword, because the edition I read was an anniversary one, with an afterword by Russo, Jenny's best friend. And I couldn't have cared less about a privileged white man's perspective on a transgender woman's journey. I ended up skipping it. I did appreciate Grace's account.
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