Sex and Vanity: A GMA Book Club Pick: A Novel
The iconic author of the bestselling phenomenon Crazy Rich Asians returns with the glittering tale of a young woman who finds herself torn between two men: the WASPY fiancé of her family's dreams and George Zao, the man she is desperately trying to avoid falling in love with.
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"You poor muddled girl! Youâve been deluded into being a racist toward yourself! ~Mrs Zao âSex and Vanity â p.305
That is the theme of this book, how people and even ourselves can be racist. I am Asian. I've had idiots say to me, "oh, are you delivering the food to the meeting?" when I had my purse and a bag that says "Nordstrum" as I am stepped into the elevator at work. What?! Who says that to people? Is that what you think of when you see me? I am in a suit, you twit! Do I ask them that stupid question whenever I see them carrying a bag of take out food? No, it's not funny. Especially when you do this every single time. Oh I can really go on with this topic sadly.
I had the hardest time reading this book without reflecting parts of my own life. How my family frowned upon me when they were annoyed I wasn't dating my own kind. "No", they would say, "We want you to date your own kind." For the longest time, I simply didn't date Asian guys. It never occured to me why I didn't, other than I just wasn't interested in them. Then I read this book and I remembered how I often felt annoyed at some of the "loudness" some of the older generation are. How they can speak too loudly thinking the person who's sitting right next to them can't hear them. How their generosity is often a display of show because I don't care who picks up the darn check, I want to leave already. I don't want a huge scene where two matriarchs fight to pay the bill for a half hour. All that influenced me not to date "my own kind." I was ashamed of these things and I realized, "shoot, I'm racist against my own kind."
As life continued, I mellowed out and met more people and married someone my family "approved" of. The funny thing is they don't accept him, even though he's Asian. He's a "Banana" they would say in our language in front of him, knowing he doesn't speak or understand the native language. I often have replied to them in our native tongue with the sweetest smile and honey voice, "STFU" to their horror and dismay. See, they are racist against those who they deem not "Asian enough." The end result is just as "Sex and Vanity" stated, marry someone who you love and can't live without. No matter what, you won't be pleasing everyone other than yourself. Those who love you can still be racist. Ya, I'm calling you out Grandma.Â
Once again, Kevin Kwan displayed the accuracy of our culture. It did hit a cord within me.Â
That is the theme of this book, how people and even ourselves can be racist. I am Asian. I've had idiots say to me, "oh, are you delivering the food to the meeting?" when I had my purse and a bag that says "Nordstrum" as I am stepped into the elevator at work. What?! Who says that to people? Is that what you think of when you see me? I am in a suit, you twit! Do I ask them that stupid question whenever I see them carrying a bag of take out food? No, it's not funny. Especially when you do this every single time. Oh I can really go on with this topic sadly.
I had the hardest time reading this book without reflecting parts of my own life. How my family frowned upon me when they were annoyed I wasn't dating my own kind. "No", they would say, "We want you to date your own kind." For the longest time, I simply didn't date Asian guys. It never occured to me why I didn't, other than I just wasn't interested in them. Then I read this book and I remembered how I often felt annoyed at some of the "loudness" some of the older generation are. How they can speak too loudly thinking the person who's sitting right next to them can't hear them. How their generosity is often a display of show because I don't care who picks up the darn check, I want to leave already. I don't want a huge scene where two matriarchs fight to pay the bill for a half hour. All that influenced me not to date "my own kind." I was ashamed of these things and I realized, "shoot, I'm racist against my own kind."
As life continued, I mellowed out and met more people and married someone my family "approved" of. The funny thing is they don't accept him, even though he's Asian. He's a "Banana" they would say in our language in front of him, knowing he doesn't speak or understand the native language. I often have replied to them in our native tongue with the sweetest smile and honey voice, "STFU" to their horror and dismay. See, they are racist against those who they deem not "Asian enough." The end result is just as "Sex and Vanity" stated, marry someone who you love and can't live without. No matter what, you won't be pleasing everyone other than yourself. Those who love you can still be racist. Ya, I'm calling you out Grandma.Â
Once again, Kevin Kwan displayed the accuracy of our culture. It did hit a cord within me.Â
4.5 Stars
So funny and boujie!
Read my full review on The Lit Buzz
https://thelitbuzz.com/2020/06/sex-vanity-kevin-kwan
So funny and boujie!
Read my full review on The Lit Buzz
https://thelitbuzz.com/2020/06/sex-vanity-kevin-kwan
The glamour!! The richness of this book goes beyond the characters affluence, the character development was just astonishing .
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