Same As It Ever Was: A Novel

This story of motherhood and trying to figure out the complicated, unconditional love we have for our children had me very nostalgic for a time I haven’t yet lived. The main character was a bit hard to know, but in the end I felt so much empathy and love for her. I thought often of my first son and our relationship when it was just us two. I was also brought back to my own complicated relationship with my own mother. Although my kids are all much younger and my relationship with my husband is much more fraught, I could relate to never quite figuring things out, but always knowing one thing, loving your kids is all that matters. I often wonder how I will feel when my kids move forward into adult hood and this book had me already getting sad and feeling empty for that time to come and how fast this all goes. Just a side note, Julia’s relationship with Helen and its evolution was a bit confusing in the beginning. I was surprised that Julia cared for her so much as it seemed to be portrayed as more a deep resentment and dislike when they first encounter each other in the beginning. I was surprised to learn that the author is neither married nor does she have children of her own. Usually, it seems harder to write of these experiences without having them on your own. I loved the imagery at the end as the main character becomes wiser and tries to move through all the uncontrollable, inevitable changes in her life.