COLLARED

WOW. This story. WOW just wow. Let me attempt to articulate what this has done to me. Number one it is very dark, this girl, the main girl has been through hell, 10 years being captive, collard to a chain.... for 10 years. I have read lots of post trauma books, and the characters always find a way to the light. Which is such a sigh of relief, its hard to think that main characters never get their light. Well this book had me thinking that the main character would never see light. In a sense I am glad I got to see a side of this, this post trauma, trying to get back to your old self, but who are you now. It was very realisitic.. no corny "ta da" moment where she sees the light and all is forgotten. No, this girl, Jade, is her name.... is constantly struggling with the darkness, with her PTSD, all those panic attacks send her into a downward spiral. She is lost for a while trying to naviagate out with the help of (time to bring in the BEST BOOK BOYFRIEND EVER) her boyfriend(before being kindapped) now friend, she describes in this story as her anchor. In which that very symbolic use of term of endearment, but in many way at many times he was literally that.

At the end of the day this survivor's story taught me patience, so many times I wanted to yell out in the empty living room, "Get over it girl, he's there, pick him, let him help you!" The patience and understanding made me realize everyone has their own struggle, some are good at asking for help, others ignore the advice, some spiral all the way down to a place that they cannot recognize themselves...
Jade chose to live she chose to be brave and to keep working on herself, and the end of the book isn't this huge resolution-epic-love-scene (not sure is that is a spoiler) but it is beautfiul. It is a grown up ending. An ending that I could envision an new begining for her and possibly the boyfriend... but no spoilers!!!!
Not the type of ending I am used to but I'm thankful for the lesson I learned, so thank you, Nicole Williams.