Community Reviews
Chapter 1
If someone you care about is acting weird and are saying things like "if something happens to me..." and "I need to go somewhere..." then you, of course, worry and ask questions, right.
Sookie, she just nods and walks away.
Chapter 2
page 18- Sookie says something like "I have never seen a dead body...". I'm flabbergasted. She has seen more dead people than alive. And I'm not talking about the vampires here.
Page 23- Sookie says Arlene is stupid. Sookie is that girl with 0 female friends.
Page 29- She is thinking about Bill. She misses his thick hair.
Page 30- Only after one page she is thinking about JB de Rone; How hot he is and that she wants to have sex with him. I guess Bill's hair is not thick enough.
Page 31- "I want to feel his lips on my neck. I want to feel his hands around me. I miss talking to him..." They don't talk. Ever. She might miss his dick though, but that's the case with every male in Sookie's life.
Chapter 3
Page 46- Eric is very hot and she is telling us how good it was kissing him. It would have been a lie to call Bill's hair thick now.
Chapter 4
page 58- Alcide Herveaux is entering the book. He is described as big, attractive and he is a werewolf. With other words; he will be fucking Sookie soon.
Page 65- Now Sam is worried about the women he loves so much. Sookie. Sam can't move on. The author won't let him.
Page 70- Alcide tells Sookie that she is pretty and I'm laughing hysterical like a crazy person.
Page 78- Sookie wants to have sex with Alcide. Surprise...! I guess we can call Bill's hair thin now.
Chapter 5
page 81- Sookie actually compliments a female! Charlaine harris? Is everything Okey? Oh, you're good... Damnit.
Page 82- the author makes sure Sookie gets complimented back.
Page 84- Sookie saves Janice's earrings. (What is it with these fking earrings?)
Page 86- Sookie gets a compliment.
Page 88- Sookie gets a compliment.
Page 97- Sookie gives herself a compliment.
page 99- Sookie gets a compliment. And Sookie gives herself a compliment.
Page 103- Sookie is very wanted. A couple of men are hitting on her.
Chapter 6
page 113- Sookie is now making out with Alcide. Bill is starting to lose hair.
Chapter 7
page 138- She just buried a dead body in the woods and now she is very afraid she might have broken a nail.
Chapter 8
page 151- Eric is licking Sookie's crocodile tears. LITERALLY!
Chapter 9
page 163- She's dancing a very lesbian dance with another girl and every guy in the room want and know they will be fking Sookie soon.
Page 164- Sookie gets many compliments and also compliments herself.
Page 168- You know you're a shitty vampire when a slutty waitress with an IQ of 47 has to save your ass from extinction.
Chapter 10
page 181- Sookie's excuse for fucking everyone is: my body wanted it.
Page 186- "I cant have sex with a vampire, especially not Eric, just because I find him attractive...", Oh yes you can Sookie. We know you can do it! No, seriously. we actually know.
Page 187- this page is full of Sookie's excuses. I think it is about here Charlaine Harris realizes Sookie is not a virgin anymore.
Chapter 11
page 204- Sookie saves Bill.
Page 220-... And Bill rewards her by raping her. She is crying and screaming. Very romantic.
Chapter 13
page 254- "It's my future lover your talking about. Show some respect." says Eric to another guy. I giggled. Sookie is everybody's future and past lover. Including Eric's (we know you will do it.)
The end.
If someone you care about is acting weird and are saying things like "if something happens to me..." and "I need to go somewhere..." then you, of course, worry and ask questions, right.
Sookie, she just nods and walks away.
Chapter 2
page 18- Sookie says something like "I have never seen a dead body...". I'm flabbergasted. She has seen more dead people than alive. And I'm not talking about the vampires here.
Page 23- Sookie says Arlene is stupid. Sookie is that girl with 0 female friends.
Page 29- She is thinking about Bill. She misses his thick hair.
Page 30- Only after one page she is thinking about JB de Rone; How hot he is and that she wants to have sex with him. I guess Bill's hair is not thick enough.
Page 31- "I want to feel his lips on my neck. I want to feel his hands around me. I miss talking to him..." They don't talk. Ever. She might miss his dick though, but that's the case with every male in Sookie's life.
Chapter 3
Page 46- Eric is very hot and she is telling us how good it was kissing him. It would have been a lie to call Bill's hair thick now.
Chapter 4
page 58- Alcide Herveaux is entering the book. He is described as big, attractive and he is a werewolf. With other words; he will be fucking Sookie soon.
Page 65- Now Sam is worried about the women he loves so much. Sookie. Sam can't move on. The author won't let him.
Page 70- Alcide tells Sookie that she is pretty and I'm laughing hysterical like a crazy person.
Page 78- Sookie wants to have sex with Alcide. Surprise...! I guess we can call Bill's hair thin now.
Chapter 5
page 81- Sookie actually compliments a female! Charlaine harris? Is everything Okey? Oh, you're good... Damnit.
Page 82- the author makes sure Sookie gets complimented back.
Page 84- Sookie saves Janice's earrings. (What is it with these fking earrings?)
Page 86- Sookie gets a compliment.
Page 88- Sookie gets a compliment.
Page 97- Sookie gives herself a compliment.
page 99- Sookie gets a compliment. And Sookie gives herself a compliment.
Page 103- Sookie is very wanted. A couple of men are hitting on her.
Chapter 6
page 113- Sookie is now making out with Alcide. Bill is starting to lose hair.
Chapter 7
page 138- She just buried a dead body in the woods and now she is very afraid she might have broken a nail.
Chapter 8
page 151- Eric is licking Sookie's crocodile tears. LITERALLY!
Chapter 9
page 163- She's dancing a very lesbian dance with another girl and every guy in the room want and know they will be fking Sookie soon.
Page 164- Sookie gets many compliments and also compliments herself.
Page 168- You know you're a shitty vampire when a slutty waitress with an IQ of 47 has to save your ass from extinction.
Chapter 10
page 181- Sookie's excuse for fucking everyone is: my body wanted it.
Page 186- "I cant have sex with a vampire, especially not Eric, just because I find him attractive...", Oh yes you can Sookie. We know you can do it! No, seriously. we actually know.
Page 187- this page is full of Sookie's excuses. I think it is about here Charlaine Harris realizes Sookie is not a virgin anymore.
Chapter 11
page 204- Sookie saves Bill.
Page 220-... And Bill rewards her by raping her. She is crying and screaming. Very romantic.
Chapter 13
page 254- "It's my future lover your talking about. Show some respect." says Eric to another guy. I giggled. Sookie is everybody's future and past lover. Including Eric's (we know you will do it.)
The end.
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